september 2003

shortest movie review ever

i watched "sleepy hollow" last night. i forgot how much fun a movie about rolling heads could be. this movie does a great job of combining a decent horror movie with some dark humor. also the scenery absolutely kicks ass. makes me want to live in northern new england for a season. i think i was born a couple centuries too late. also i don't think enough people do movie reviews on flicks that came out 4 years ago.

32 days until nba season

so the trend of rather disconcerting dreams continues. the night before last proved to be a sub-par night of sleep. i dreamt that i went to a gas station or a store or something to use the restroom. i didn't pay much attention to the clerk. all of a sudden i am in a hospital room or something and the clerk is in the bed, apparently really sick. not just physically ill but also a sick bastard because he was pooping a lot then showing it to me. then a nurse or someone comes in and throws really salty tortilla chips at the poor guy and he shrivels up like a snail in a salt lake and he is gone. before i have a chance to mourn the death of mr. shitzalot he regenerates right there on the spot and walks out of the room wearing a black suit. i think i need help.

we have a double duty edition of reader mail today, and mau continues his reign of terror with another deep thought, right above the quote by einstein himself. also you may have noticed that the links section on the left nav underwent quite an overhaul. same links just mo' culluz 'n sheeit.

mau found me some singing horsies. i feel bad for not getting him anything.

this girl is so hot i about went apeshit.

this tree has has some peepees.

one of the funnier videos i've seen in a while. i won't give it away just watch it.

games

complete burnination available here.

tank game.

this is a cool role playing game with not so killer graphics. bonus points for being able to kill yourself by jumping off the end of the world.

if someone can figure out what the hell this game is about i'll give you a dollar.

lawdy i'm tired

i have nothing to write about so read some random stuff and play some random games.

this site is so cool that it has been added to the left nav as a permanent fixture. it's about a little ninja with an english accent and it has episodes so click it already. once again thanks mike.

james hetfield is selling his camaro. proceeds will be donated to schools.

this car is a little quicker off the line than james' camaro. not bad for battery powered.

someone is really good with legos.

russian roulette. i only played once but it was worth it to see the gimp take one to the head. he's ok now.

kill the dog from duck hunt.

this is why i don't "dabble" with drugs.

he was too tired for sex, but he had enough gas to start a fire...

strike 3

for the first time in his successful career, the omaly finally evaded the evil grasp of work completely. that's right, i pitched a no-hitter on friday, omaly 1, work 0. after arriving to work 2 hours late because of an exploding truck, i sat at my desk and got paid to do this. that is ALL i did at work. what do you do for a living?

on a side note i had a rather disconcerting morning. in my hasty attempt to dress myself i discovered that i was out of t-shirts. none in the laundry basket. check the chair, nope. did i drape one over my bass amp perhaps? negative major nekidass. drastic times call for drastic measures. my only hope was to check the oblivian of the t-shirt world: the t-shirt drawer. i know what you're thinking, why would there possibly be t-shirts in there? i was desperate. maybe i could find my old beavis and butthead t-shirt, nobody would notice. when i finally opened the drawer i was decimated by what i saw: a drawer full of folded t-shirts and a twenty dollar bill. apparently, last night while i was sleeping, someone snuck into my room, folded my t-shirts and gave me 20 bucks. i feel so violated. it gets worse. after i got to work and took care of the first fruits of morning business (read: check personal email from the weekend) i head on down to the lobby for some coffee cuz let's face it this round is on the t-shirt fairy. after placing my order i have a little chat with starbucks dood about the exploding truck on friday and how he never made it to work while i wait for him to ring me up. no dice. after all i had been through this morning i didn't even get to pay for 4 dollar coffee. sometimes it's tough being the mighty omaly.

we got some new reader mail and our first ever reader submitted quote, thanks myke. mau gave us a new deep thought.

i guess they have a different kind of traffic in oklahoma.

now these are ladies.

happy friday watch out for flying omaly heds

my update today is a little out of control because i am a cosmic force when it comes to finding ways to waste your time. also i had 2 multi-shot espresso beverages in a row yesterday (got hooked up for free), so expect nothing less than a nice dose of dysfunctional scatterbrain omaly today. pass the funk there willis.

our new top 10 list is about fun with public transportation. i did the amazing artwork also.

i have a liquor store on my AIM buddy list. i rule.

we have a new deep thought today, it's on the serious tip but good stuff nonetheless. our latest joke involves religion.

here is an mp3 version of a tune that me and mau did. it's a tite little jam so download it already.

our video for today features someone with a lot of time on his hands.

i finally found a flash movie with a squirrel, a penguin, burt reynolds and the dukes of hazard like all you guys have been wondering about. sorry it took so long.

a great site to visit if you need some cash. thanks mike.

someone in singapore needs to chill the frick out already.

i just sent my resume to this company.

it's just nuts what some people are selling on the internet.

nummy.

someone really likes muffins.

it's good to be in california.

some people have issues. this guy is an issue.

here is our obligatory "wtf" website of the day. turn your speakers up for full effect. don't worry it doesn't scream or anything, just random.

i dunno how he came up with the idea but this guy is everywhere.

i did a search for "simon and the rumbling stick heads" and this is what i got. can't win them all.

my life as an espresso junkie

it's getting ridiculous. a 3-shot coffee beverage induces a nap. today's update is short so i could get it up before i fell asleep.

a friend of mine has a really large tattoo of the omaly on his ass. to see it check out the updated friends section. we also got some new reader mail. news section updated as well.

i guess jen and ben may be done. maybe she needs a dose of the omaly. "i can make you famous jen. ever heard of my top 10 babe list...?"

i am all for patriotic displays but come on.

a smiling fetus. maybe he doesn't know what's coming.

kids crack me up.

this is what happens when you feed a horse something from taco bell.

strongbad has a new teen girl squad movie. check it if you haven't yet.

my girlfriend says hi

this is about all i feel like posting today.

i need therapy

i had a disturbing dream night before last. i was with my pops, my uncle, and a couple of my cousins. we went out to the woods somewhere to do some fishing. other than some weird ass scenery that hasn't been invented yet there was nothing really odd about this fishing trip, except that i met up with them right after i robbed a house and stole a car. anyways, we get to "lake watdufawk" and it's kinda crowded with fisherman and the water is shallow but i see one dude across the way yank in a big one. as the fish is in mid-air somebody yells, "hey, that's a black bass, they aren't allowed to have those here", so the dam thing transformed in mid-air into a perfectly "legal" fish, you know, the kind with neon decals on the sides of their bodies. i don't even know if there is such a thing as a "black bass", probably not cuz they have a tendency to instantly change into another species. so homefry finally reels in his little shapeshifter on a hook, i admire the fish, look at my cousin for a sec to make sure he sees it, then look back at the fish only to discover it doesn't have a head anymore. sweet. at this point i can't wait to catch/decapitate a fish of my own. after an incredibly detailed sequence of getting my rod set up i go to the water, but cry me a river there were no fish to be found. here is where my little gem de la subconscious took a rather off-putting turn. i get the brilliant idea of coughing stuff up and spitting it into the lake, and then all the fish come up to the surface and start eating it. then everybody starts catching more fish than they know what to do with and i am the hero. captain coughy saves the day again. hence my agenda for the weekend:

1. do my best to rid myself of the last remnants of a nagging cough;

2. sign a treaty with myself to cut down on beer before sleepy time;

3. double check to make sure i am not on crack;

other than that i'm wide open this weekend so give me a shout if you wanna go fishing or something.

mo' reada mail. we also got a new deep thought from the great one himself. our new top 10 list is a happy little tune about things that annoy me.

funny pic submitted by the roommate.

this guy is pretty funny. my personal fav's are "motherly love" and "invisible."

this is by far one of the funniest videos i have ever seen. it's quicktime so if you don't have it get it.

here's our random video of the day.

ok gametime childrens:

fun with monkeys.

here's a fun game on homestar that only uses the spacebar. i still suck at it.

nonstop fun with a bouncing ball.

happy birthday mau. welcome back football.

for those of you who don't know mau is the undisputed champion of my hall of AIM. he turned 6 today. here's his present from me.

the fall season is a great time of year for the omaly. for a sport i know next to nothing about football is one of the more addicting things on free television and let's face it my favorite way to kill a sunday. also football season brings about monday night football which takes the bite out of a typically bloody day of the week. there is nothing like getting home on a monday night, grabbing some game-time grub, then falling asleep in my work clothes to the sound of "first and ten on the..." zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

speaking of tv i inadvertantly stumbled upon some pure televised genius while channel surfing (let that be a lesson to the ladies...). spike tv airs a show called "most extreme elimination challenge" and it is beyond awesome. it's basically american gladiators meets nickelodeon meets kung fu movie. who knew badly subtitled tv could be so much fun? check it out if you haven't already.

we got some new mail, news, quotes and a reader submitted pic.

our game for the day is something i should have found a long time ago. bonus points for decapitation and a cameo by arnold.

german dood reunited with his bell bottoms.

i would be mad too if the goalie ate my arm.

i think my true calling is to be a foreign diplomat.

just say no to tanlines.

the theme of today's links is when web sites and drugs meet:

musical waffles that fart.

whoa.

uhhh...

hmm...

booya. watchout internet.

welcome to the irishpeso.com kickoff party, where links flow like the swallows of cappucino. we got hotties, we got beer, and of course we got links.

it was time for the omaly to spread his wings and get his own webspace. now you and your family can enjoy pop-up free omaly surfing for hours on end. everything on the site is half off and we're open late. free delivery.

much thanks to media temple for their hosting services. also props to beav for helping me set everything up, he is a web ANIMAL. in about 10 minutes he had a domain registered, email account set up, sharks with lazer beams on their heads, and a standing army of 10,000 to help me take over the world. scottie's on fire!

all my old stuff is archived on the left so fear not you can still play your favorite games that i found for you. there's also a new email to use (especially if your name happens to be lil shit) but if you accidentally use the old one i won't shoot you, at least not in the junk. and as always you can AIM me somethin sweet at walks with pint. enough sweet talk let's get ta clickin.

i have crazy links today because i'm craaaaazy omaly.

watchout for suicidal cows.

this drunken monkey could kick my ass. it's a video so do some right-clicking and save-as-ing.

now is the time to stock up for the holidays.

i wonder what it's like to shit your pants in a wetsuit.

this is why i take the bus to work.

mmmmmmmm...

the omaly-mobile scored a 79.

you may have seen this before but i think it sums things up nicely.

who says guys don't like chocolate...

noses were meant to smell but come on. just come on.

game on dewds.

this game is impossible. i tried to submit my score of 0 to the winners board but no dice.

one of the greatest ideas for a game ever. no scores just good clean fun. also sometimes the cars just run over people.

sweet.