longest posting ever

ok kiddos since the weekend draws nigh upon us i thought i would introduce a new beer to the peso list of acceptable brewhou. legend has it that last week the omaly found himself at a local pub (literally and metaphysically speaking) killing some time while waiting for the LS. this particular pub had sixty (6-T) beers on tap, so you can imagine my enthusiasm. upon noticing a beer called "arrogant bastard" my curiosity got the best of me and i simply had to try it. my intrepid spirit was well rewarded, this turned out to be one of the best pints of brew i had ever tasted. it's an amber ale, roughly similar to bass, newcastle, pete's wicked, sam adams boston ale, etc, but is quite distinct from it's mass marketed counterparts. my first impression was the sweetness of this beer, nowhere near a cider but a stark contrast to the hoppy bitterness that often defines an amber ale. there was an implied fruitiness, similar to sam adams lager, coupled with a nice full malty caramel flavor that serves as a reminder that you are not drinking a wussy beer. upon sampling my new discovery the LS gave it an enthusiastic "mmmm MMMMMM bitch!" that left little doubt as to my fortuitous discovery. please note this brew packs a punch with 7.2% alky so plan accordingly; this brew marked the first time since the omaly was in pampers that one pint actually registered. arrogant bastard is brewed by stone brewing company down in san marcos cali by people who apparently know what they are doing. give it a try me thinky you likey.

ok once again the omaly proves to be behind the times but ever faithful in promoting things he thinks are cool while simultaneously writing in third person. i finally saw the first installment of "kill bill" this week and was floored. amazingly cool flick. there is just something about seeing uma thurman slice and dice a room full of retro henchman. the hottie factor is definitely in effect with said uma, lucy liu, and the girl with the swinging ball o' death. the half frenchie was hot until she got her arm chopped off, that just doesn't do it for me. i also thought the mid-movie animated sequence was a nice little detour. QT has delivered again and i eagerly await volume two. also i think i should go out and get a sword just in case some guy in a mask decides to start some shit. while we're at it let's go ahead and make uma the official hottie of the week.

nba alert: non-basketball fans skip on down to the links.

well the nba regular season is officially over and boy did muh boys finish with a bang. if you are like me and didn't get to see what kobe did in the last game check it out here. can you say assassin? apparently the shot he made to send it into overtime was even more amazing. the victory and the loss by sacramento on the same night was enough to give the lakers the top spot in the pacific division (sorry tina...). that means the only teams in the west the lakers don't have home court against would be minny and the spurs, which IMO would be our toughest opponents, particularly san antonio. for now we kick things off against houston, i give it to the lakers in 5. on a side note i would offer a friendly little wager to miss tina: should the lakers and kings meet in the playoffs i will bet on my beloved purple and gold. the winner buys the steaks for the next poker night. sound good?

ok let's have some clickies:

i'm going to find a way to make this image a permanent part of my site:

hilarious cartoon about the "fatkins diet."

subservient chicken. i asked him to eat a chicken sandwich and i got a blank stare.

jazz cats. vibe kitty rules.

i don't even know.

just when i think the stupidity level of the human race has tapered off someone breaks new ground.

i like sports well enough but come on dude.

strangely addicting game that i suck at.

coffee: the root of evil?

i am a coffee fiend. i am a starbucks fiend. i spend more money there then i would like to admit to or be directly conscious of (myke my apologies for the terminal preposition). this is mainly due to the fact that i am stuck at work for 8.5 hours a day with little or nothing to do. the event that is getting up from my desk and going down to the mini-starbucks down in the lobby (that's right i don't even need to leave the building) to procure fancy caffeine for a mere three bucks and change seems to be enough to dissuade a boredom induced coma that would inevitably lead to me leaving the premises with a pink slip and a mean case of keyboard-head. every employee that works at the downstairs starbucks knows me by name and beverage. the shift manager in the morning takes it a step further and adds an extra espresso shot when nobody is watching. in the afternoon i tend towards the cold beverages, usually iced mochas with the occasional frappucino. my only complaint about the fraps: they look good right after they are prepared, but give them 10 minutes to settle and it looks like you're carrying around an alien pupate in a clear plastic cup with a straw sticking out of one of his three assess (alien pupates shit a lot). it's a bubbly, membraneous mess of a beverage. add whip cream to the chaos and i think it would actually spawn a race of little frappy creatures. i think if i had a bad dream about them stabbing me with straws i would save a lot of money. just look at him with his perfectly shaped coffee head and that menacing straw. oh sure he looks cute and fluffy and refreshing now, but just wait until he stabs you in the eye with his straw and defecates in your ocular cavity.

...

i'm rick james bitch

once again i was late to the cool bus but i have to give some funny points to "chappelle's show" on comedy central. one of the few comedy shows that consistently delivers creative entertainment without simply poking fun at the same things over and over. dave is one of the funniest comedians to come along since chris rock and i'm glad he's raking it in with his own show. another bit of funny that i was lucky enough to encounter is the "blue collar comedy tour." these are four funny ass hicks muh childrens so check 'em out. this brings me to a short little rant. i'm not going to point fingers at any television programs or comedians in particular but making fun of the president is a tired joke, give it a rest already. yes it's slightly amusing when he delivers yet another bushism, but when you show the clip or otherwise repeat the presidential mishap and then comment on it trying to make it funnier it's just fawking redundant, now and 4 years ago. this has nothing to do with my political stance as the last thing i actually bothered voting for was probably the new m&m color (i think i went for black, cirrusly that's just a badass m&m). i wouldn't care if your material was actually funny, it may have been the first few thousand times. he's from texas, he speaks differently then your hippie ass and he bungles words on occasion, we get it already. find some new material, i know you can do it. until then your tv show sucks. on that note make your own bush speech.

while i'm at it something else has been irritating me lately. i have been a devoted user of a certain more-than-warm email service provider for several years now. the email has been more or less reliable and i have no real gripes about it, other than the constant inbox offers for "extra storage." it's not that expensive but that's what hard drives are for numbnuts. why would i want to give you 20 bucks when i can just right click my happy ass into some storage that came with my machine? that makes about as much sense as renting a storage unit for my lawnmower, chances are it's easier to just keep it where i'm going to use it. anyways, after logging out of said email i am redirected to an uber-web page that absolutely inundates me with content. while i admire the attempt to have every bit of data in the cosmos in front of me after checking my email, i can't help but notice that this information overload is yet another attempt to shove pop culture down my throat. it's like an entire hour of commercials magically condensed into a single webpage, telling me what car to drive, how to dress, where to find a date, what do do for work, etc. also there are "articles" that take the term "pointless" to new heights of grandeur. have a look at this insightful little gem about coffee shop etiquette. that's right, an entire article devoted to proper manners for working on your hip little laptop drinking your hip little half-caf non-fat no foam "no-fuzzy-little-animals-hurt-in-the-making-of-this beverage" latte with your hip little pda that cost more than your car but only slightly more than your coffee. one of the pointers that some asshat of a gimptard actually took the time to not only write up but also deliver to the ever mind-numbing web is "take your stuff with you." wow don't hurt yourself there enlightened one. i hate to think that someone actually brainstormed or had a meeting about such an inane bit of wisdom. the article also mentions making an aesthetic contribution by dressing in "casual chic." i'm inspired to roll into a coffee shop in a shopping cart wearing my jr high gym shorts and a star trek t-shirt out of spite and instead of a laptop i'll be working on my paint by numbers book bitch. moving on.

once again i talk about the lakers and once again they start losing right after i give them props. that's it i give up. the next time i talk about them is after they win the hardware. apparently everytime i sing the praises of the purple and gold some kharma shit is unbalanced and we lose games. let's get to some links before i get really pissed.

this could have been really bad...

this could have been worse

this page is magically addicting.

this is just sad.

shoot some sheep game.

here's our invention of the week. good idea helping people with their posture, bad idea making them look like a tard that lost a fight with a giant slingshot.

our hottie of the week is gonna go ahead and be kate beckinsale cuz she makes me randy.

april is a dumb month but whatever

welcome to april kiddos. april is one of those special months that strike me as having no real purpose. the springtime months in general tend to be dull but all of the other months have some kind of redeeming factor. march has the almighty st patty's day. may has memorial day and good old cinco de mayo. february is mercifully short and has the good sense to have a 3-day weekend to sweeten the deal. april has none of these qualities to ease it's passing. in fact the only thing this month is famous for is tax time, not exactly something we look forward to. in other news i've had a sore throat for almost 2 weeks now, and the meds some doc prescribed ended up giving me a mouth infection. happy foggin days. i decided to buy a new shotgun to help me get better.

in other news the lakers are kicking some arse lately, working opponents over with sweet passing while telling the rest of the league "eff ewe and hand over the hardware already." they've won 10 straight and are a league-best 21-4 since the all star break. yes that is a ridiculous second half record. when shaq and karl think about the other teams they have to laugh. there's a pic of me and shaq having a laugh during a time out. sometimes he makes fun of my farmer's tan on my arms but i think he's just jealous of my cool shades. we are best buds sometimes. he says i dunk it too much but he's probably right. remember childrens real friends aren't afraid to be honest sometimes. everyone should have a shaq...

short little aim update.

videos a la mau:

trip out.

secret footage of what i actually do at work. i'm the one on the far right.

then i installed a webcam at my desk for a real inside look at what the omaly does.

owned.

hottie of the week:

dayam...